Scaffolding Me to Mom

on behalf of august 21, 2015

This message couldn't be clearer, I don't think.  When I try to take the reins in my own life, the results will never be as I hope.  The devil comes in an destroys that which we wish to protect most and hold dear.  But giving it back to the Lord, you're the only one who has any real control, and you remedy the bonds we cherish most dearly.  I'm thankful for my growth and love with mom.  A few months ago, I could never have imagined that the relationship would have improved as much as it has.  I would have thought this impossible, but for you, nothing is impossible.  For you, this was the blink of an eye in which we learned to live and love each other.  The laughs and smiles, I love them.  It would devastate me for it to all break and fall away.  But the thing is, you see, that I saw it break.  For a split second, it seemed like everything was gone.  And then I realized that I didn't make any of it happen.  I didn't do anything.  It was all hanging on a thread you'd spun for us.  You gifted it to us.  But now we had to continue strengthening the scaffold you gave us.  That's not to say that you disappeared from the picture.  Rather, that is to say that you would now take a lead role as the director of this relationship building project while we added the necessary reinforcements.  We will only learn if we try and do it.  But when things fail, you're still there to catch us so long as we know and recognize that you're there.  So long as we let you catch us and then replace us on the scaffold, to continue building until there is some undefined point of completion.  We don't know what the final product looks like exactly, but for that too we must trust you and humble ourselves to your artistic liberties and vision.  We don't have to know.  We just have to lay our pride down and follow.