Reminder: You Have 1 New Message(s)

psalm 28:7

God is the best thing that could have ever "happened" to me.  more than i realize, i've taken him for granted in the past, but today i had a serious wake up call to the miracles he's worked in my life--without me even noticing them, apparently.  its like... its like i've developed some sort of horrible apathy to him to the degree where i have difficulty recognizing him and discerning his beauty in my life.  i'm appalled at myself for that.

that wake up call?  a student at school--a student who i would say is extremely well liked, makes the best jokes, extremely intelligent/clever and recognize for those talents--confessed to the class about having thoughts of suicide and being in the process of treatment for severe clinical depression.  a student that seemed to have it all together on the outside.  a student that was popular.  a student that (from my perspective anyways) had it made.  for me, i suddenly realized that i had been incredibly blessed by God and that regardless of whatever ups and downs come at me in life, i have always had--and will always continue--to have him right behind me, ready to catch me if i fall.  now, i dont mean that in a "God is plan B" sort of way.  at least, im trying my best to phrase this so it doesnt come across that way.  God is plan A (through Z) and he's 100000x awesomer than any other design--so much so, in fact, that i dont even need a plan B.  and thanks to God, in both happy moments and sad, i've had someone who protects me--from my pride and from discouragement.  i didn't even realize what a blessing it was to be shielded in that way by God.  because as long as i trust in God, he takes care of me and i can find comfort in the certainty of his designs--even if i dont know what those designs actually are.   in fact, even when i fall short and mess up, he's there for me.

normally, i think of that student (whose confession startled me) as lucky.  normally, i think of that student as better than me and having been more generally blessed than me.  but now i realize thats not true--because God found me and took me in and i wanted enough to be found and i am in him.  im the one who's "lucky," who's been blessed.  i pray that student will find God one day too, soon.

its been a long time since ive taken the time to appreciate the grace of God and his gift of life.  before, my heart lept for joy, but for the wrong reasons, and it forgot _why_ it was able to leap for joy and experience such love.  today it remembers why again and sees me and my life as being richly blessed.  in order to refrain from apathy, i will write down what God blessed me with that day when i go to sleep.

today's blessing? God's reminder, plus a long awaited letter.